Reacties doen het weer ! Comments is switched on again!

Hello you all, 26/11 saturday

If you want to, you can comment again,
Underneath every blog post there is an open Comment field.
Comment, if you wish ; With a name, anonymous, or a question, or request...
It is up to you!

Anyway thanks all, for reading our blog all your interest helps to keep us going!
It is not always easy, but we will stay on this journey till we have reached a positive ending.

Thank You.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Hallo Allemaal,

As je dat wilt, kun je weer reacties achterlaten.
Onder elk stukje is er een open veld voor reacties.
Met naam, anoniem, een vraag of een verzoek...
Het is aan jou!

Hoe dan ook, bedankt voor het lezen van onze blog jullie interesse helpt ons door te gaan.
Het is niet altijd gemakkelijk, maar we blijven op reis tot we een positief einde bereikt hebben.

Bedankt.

The Waiting Game --- Of wel nog steeds wachten

So, back with some news about our ongoing adoption story.
We got a call from Wereldkinderen, our agency but not with the news we were waiting for.

I already said to Jane," I think we will hear from them soon", well I was right about that.

Our dossier is at the National Adoption Committee and they have reviewed it and the Director of Children’s Services talked to the CWSK (our representative agency in Kenya that they want more information).

They are talking about another 3 forms:
- 6th schedule / social enquiry
- 2nd referral
- information about our adoption from Ethiopia

The 1st is strange since it is full of information that we do not know yet about the 'to be adopted child'.

The 2nd is even stranger since we already sent 2 great referrals (recommendations. So maybe they have to count again.

The 3rd is a bit puzzling, we can not see why it is needed and it is not possible to legalise any documents since they are all from Ethiopia.

So we have regular contact with Wereldkinderen and CWSK about what is expected of us.

The 2 slightly positive pieces of information are that:
Immediately after we have a proposal from Wereldkinderen we can travel to Kenya, there is no waiting time anymore.(Was 1 to 2 months). Though we will need a few weeks to sort things out here, travelling 'immediately' would be quite difficult.

Because the procedure takes so long now and is very thorough(at the beginning) it is maybe possible to shorten our stay in Kenya from the 9 months to less than that ...

Of course we will keep everybody informed here!
But no Christmas gift, in the shape of a proposal, for us in 2011.

*** *** *** ***

Eindelijk nieuws over de adoptie, maar niet het nieuws waar we op hoopten...
Tegen Jane zei ik :'ik denk dat ze vandaag gaan bellen',
Nou dat klopte ook wel met een verzoek om meer informatie.

Het Nationaal Adoptie Comité heeft ons dossier bekeken en laat via het CWSK,
de lokale vertegenwoordiger in Kenia, dat ze nog meer informatie willen.
Het gaat om 3 documenten:
- Ten 1ste, 6th schedule sociale achtergronden
- 2de een tweede getuigenis mvan mensen die ons goede ouders vinden
- 3de informatie over de adoptie van Matthew uit Ethiopie

Het 1ste is heel vreemd want gaat grotendeels over het te adopteren kind en dus vol vragen waarop wij het antwoord (nog) niet weten...
Het 2de is nog vreemder, want we hebben 2 uitstekende getuigenissen (waarvoor dank!) DUS misschien moeten ze nog eens tellen.
Het derde daarvan zien we niet in waarom ze dit willen en alle documenten zijn Ethiopisch en daarom hier niet te legaliseren.

Via Wereldkinderen is er nu regelmatig contact met CWSK in Kenia om de procedure op het goede spoor te houden.
Twee mogelijke goede punten zijn dat we nu gehoord hebben dat;
Direct na het aanvaarden van een voorstel (Naam, leeftijd en geslacht kind) kunnen we afreizen naar Kenia. (was eerst 1-2 maanden wachttijd)
Misschien is het mogelijk, omdat de procedure nu zo zorgvuldig is, om de periode van verblijf in Kenia iets te verkorten, naar minder dan 9 maanden..

Maar goed we houden eenieder via deze weg op de hoogte.
In December geen kadootje in de vorm van een voorstel, dat zal pas in 2012 gebeuren.

Music and lyrics... ( about kids and parents)

Hello to all,

I do sometimes wonder 'Is it me you were looking for ?', from the statistics tool one can see from where people originate.. (only countries or the referral sites)

And we have readers from far afield! And through several channels.
Anyway, don't be shy and let me know If you have any questions, or leave a reaction!

(Since we seem to be in a 'holding pattern' here as far as adoption goes,
subjects you would like to hear about are welcome as well, I do not NEED to blog every week, but do have enough opinions ... ;-)

Anyway this time a different subject again, underneath some great songs about parents and children.

For the Dutch there is our local hero Marco;Dochters, Marco Borsato
Which starts of with 'Quarter past seven on Sunday morning..' a line we are (at least) very familiar with! It is a sweet song about growing up, but it might have been inspired by another, which we will mention later.
One of the best known songs is Papa, from Stef Bos with the line 'but dad I am more like you all the time' a sentiment I at least can very much acknowledge!

There is also lot of sentiment in it if you are a father of an adopted son.
All the physical likeness can be skipped immediately (lucky for Matthew in my case!) but in my opinion there is enough space still in the nature versus nurture discussion to recognize a lot of myself in Matthew's behaviour.

{ "can not sit still, talks too much"; could be my report card, as both my sisters will agree }

Of course there is also the rap trio; Yes-R, Ali B, Lange Frans with 'Me Boy '
A nice try, if you like (dutch) rap music.
For American rap there is 2Pac, with Dear Mama.
And last but not least our very local (from Haarlem) Alain Clark, Father and friend, which he sings with his own father. This song (and Alain) I have always liked a lot, there are some really nice lines in it, with nice sentiments about growing up and the differences between generations.

Other possible contenders in our Parents & Kids list could be;
Mama, by the Spice Girls cheesy girlgroup but still a classic ;-)
Father to son, Phil Collins who has made quite some stuff with decent lyrics and not only Sky Radio background muzak!

And I also like The Day, by Babyface who is a big producer and singer/songwriter himself but not so well known.
Of course Whitney Houston, with The greatest love of all With the lyrics no one can argue about 'I believe the children are our future'; good lyrics too much Houston ?!

Other possibilities:
Isn't she lovely, Stevie Wonder definitely a classic, bit too sweet?
Ready,Set,Don't go- Billy Ray Cyrus sung sometimes with his daughter 'Hannah Montana'.

For people who like the real 'oldies' it could be argued that the Frank Sinatra songs; Young at heart & You make me feel so young are also about kids or at least about youth(s).

There are also some more obscure titles like:
Baby Girl Window, Robbie Williams (sad, and a bit unlike him)
Guns and Roses, Sweet Child of mine (bit unclear from the lyrics)
Lullabye, Billy Joel (Not very well known song, great artist though!)
Flowers for Zoe, Lenny Kravitz (for his daughter with Lisa Bonnet)
A child's prayer, the Hot Chocolate version (old, but nice)
Children, EMF An indie dance band from the Midlands, UK (Unbelievable was their biggest hit)

The real Top Hit for both of us though must be;
Butterfly Kisses by Bob Carlisle
(by which Marco Borsato's song seems to have been inspired at least a bit)
It is a full story about a father and his daughter up to her wedding day.
He has written it for his daughter on the occasion of her 16th birthday.
Before he brought out this song,(and won a country music award) he was a relatively unknown christian country musician.
But look & listen for yourselves with the link underneath.

(and let us know what YOU think ?!)

Not much news ... 12/10/2011

Hello All,

Unfortunately there is not so much to report about the adoption at the moment.
We have heard from WereldKinderen that the CWSK (Child Welfare Society of Kenya) has received all our documents (dossier) and is now checking them before all goes to the NAC (National Adoption Committee).

We expect to know more in November at the earliest..

So settling down at work and school for some rainy (& windy) autumn days!

School holidays, birthdays in the family,Sint Maarten, Halloween, Kenya "reunion", and than we will see.

Thanks all for reading our posts and we will think about a next (related) subject!

Peter and Jane

Geven & Ontvangen/Giving and receiving

See also the One Campaign video, spot all celebrities! and let me know. More info see One.org
Na een aantal berichten in de media, dacht ik eens een ander stukje te schrijven. De titel is al een hint, in plaats van geven & nemen,
Wat meer "Voor wat, hoort wat " is, bedoel ik meer voor wat je geeft zal je uiteindelijk ook wat ontvangen, in welke vorm dan ook.
(Wie goed doet, goed ontmoet ;-)

Mede door een bezoek aan het kantoor & magazijn van Childslife in Haarlem van de week en de politieke berichten over het korten op de ontwikkelingshulp kan ik het niet nalaten hier mijn mening te geven.
De maatschappij en wij zelf, ik niet uitgezonderd, is steeds individualistischer geworden en vaak ook materialistischer.
Met de recessie en alle Euro problemen nu, is dat misschien wel begrijpelijk ook.

Maar door de toegang tot internet en tv staat 'de wereld' elke dag weer bij ons op de stoep, compleet met alle armoede die er is.

Als ik sommige mensen (politici incluis) heel gemakkelijk hoor praten over 'druppels op de gloeiende plaat', 'water naar zee dragen' en
"ze moeten maar harder werken".

Krijg ik persoonlijk plaatsvervangende schaamte. Zeker zijn er misstanden (geweest en nu nog) mbt Ontwikkelingshulp & is het goed te weten waar je geld uiteindelijk terecht komt, en hoeveel, dit is begrijpelijk.

Vanuit een beginsel van sociale, politieke, maatschappelijke betrokkenheid
vind ik dat we de verantwoordelijkheid hebben om te helpen waar we kunnen ieder naar vermogen.De reden Waarom is ook minder belangrijk dan de actie.
Zelfs als je geen religeuze achtergrond hebt denk ik dat je het gevoel kent dat je zaken niet voor lief kunt nemen en je realiseerd hoe goed je het hebt.

De christenen kennen oa de naastenliefde en een traditie van "tienden", de moslims zakat (of ushar) als 1 van de 5 pilaren van de islam.

Het feit dat een kind geboren wordt in een ander land, een ander continent kan niet de reden zijn dat zijn of haar toekomst automatisch uitzichtloos is.

Denk je eens in dat het jouw eigen kind of neefje/nichtje zou zijn die je daar in een vluchtelingen kamp ziet in Oost-Afrika ...
Wat een geluk en voorrecht dat wij in Nederland geboren zijn en leven!

Daarom denk ik dat het geven aan goede doelen altijd goed is, Welk doel dan ook, naar eigen vermogen, keuze en inzicht.

Want al wordt er uiteindelijk maar 1 kind gered, door die inenting, dat pindakaas mengseltje, die schoolopleiding dan kan er voor die persoon en door die persoon misschien toch wat veranderen!

Onderstaand wat voorbeelden van goede doelen en een verhaaltje ter overdenking.

http://www.happyrockcenter.com/

http://www.childslife.nl/

The starfish story. (deze versie The Freedom Writers Diary, bewerkt)
" An old man walking down the beach saw a young boy picking up starfish that had washed up on the shore. As he got closer, he saw the boy throwing them back into the ocean.He approached the boy and asked 'What are you doing ?' The boy replied, 'If I don't throw the starfish back in the water, they're going to die.' 'But there must be thousands of beaches and millions of starfish.You can't save them all.Don't you know you'll never make a difference!'The boy reached down and picked up a starfish and simply replied,'I'll make a difference to this one'.

See also the One Campaign video, spot all celebrities! and let me know. More info see One.org

(Als er nieuws is over de adoptie, komt dit zeker hier te staan!)

*******************************************************************************

See also the One Campaign video, spot all celebrities! and let me know. More info see One.org
Following a number of messages in the media, I thought I would write a different kind of post.  The title is a hint, instead of 'giving and taking'.  What I mean is, what you give, you will finally receive, in whatever form that may be.  (Who does goes, has good done for him). 

Partly because of a visit to the office and warehouse of Childslife in Haarlem this week, and the political news over the reduction of aid in developing countries, I could not resist giving my opinion.

Society and all of us, including myself, has become more individualistic and also often more materialistic.  With the recessions and all the Europ problems, maybe that is understandable. 
But all the access to Internet and TV, the world is on our doorstep, including all the poverty and misery. 

If I hear some people, including politicians, talking so easily about 'a drop in the ocean' or 'carrying coals to Newcastle'  or ' they should work harder', I feel ashamed for them.  Of course there are misunderstandings (in the past and still now) regarding aid and it is good to know where your money eventually ends up and how much of it is used, this is understandable.

From a social, political and societal point of view I think we have a responsibility to help if we have the means.  The reason why is less important than the action.  Even if you have no religious background I think you can still realise that you can't take things for granted and should realise how well off you are. 

As well as brotherly love, Christians have a tradition of 'tithing', the Moslins know 'zakat' (or ushar) as one of the 5 pillars of Islam. 

The fact that a child is born in another country or on another continent cannot be the reason that his or her future is automatically without any possibilities.
Just imagine that it's your own child or niece/nephew in that refugee camp in East Africa. What a stroke of luck that we were born and live in The Netherlands (or anywhere in the west).  That's why I think it's always good to give to charity.  Whatever the charity is, within your means.   Because even if you only save one child, through vaccination, that peanut-butter mix, education, that person's life may be bettered and what could that one person achieve? 

Here are some examples of charities and a story to make you think.  
http://www.happyrockcenter.com/

http://www.childslife.nl/

The starfish story. (deze versie The Freedom Writers Diary, bewerkt)
" An old man walking down the beach saw a young boy picking up starfish that had washed up on the shore. As he got closer, he saw the boy throwing them back into the ocean. He approached the boy and asked 'What are you doing ?' The boy replied, 'If I don't throw the starfishes back in the water, they're going to die.' 'But there must be thousands of beaches and millions of starfish.You can't save them all. Don't you know you'll never make a difference!' The boy reached down and picked up a starfish and simply replied, 'I'll make a difference to this one'.

See also the One Campaign video, spot all celebrities! and let me know. More info see One.org

(If there is a more news about the adoption, we will post it here!)

Kids part deux

So the last time I wrote about our first steps with adopting.

When we arrived at the offices of Wereldkinderen(WK) our agency
for a first infomation round about all the countries in 2000,
we were pretty much convinced that we were going to adopt fom South-Africa.

That it was going to be the continent of Africa was a certainty!

Through the enthousiasm of Mieke at WK (mainly) we decided to go for Ethiopia instead, and as they say " we never looked back " - only with good memories!

And we returned with and live with an amazing beautiful boy for nearly 6 years now!

We were very happy with our experiences in the country, the local people of the orphanage. And others we met, and we also got a friendship with 2 other couples through it all.

In Feb. 2009 after being on the waiting list for a second child for 3 years, we went to an information meeting about what was going on in Ethiopia,why the delays etc. The main 2 things that stayed with me (us) after this meeting were:

> Disappointment and the possibility that it would take more years of waiting
> Surprise at how impatient people (who were much younger than us) were and How distrustful they were of the WK co-workers

[so much so, that one of them said ' You can always try your luck somewhere else,if you really believe we are doing such a bad job...!'.
and these WK people have done all the customer relations courses you can think of].

Eventually WK decided to stop working with their contacts for adoption in Ethiopia and close the orphanage in Addis Ababa after reports that there were possibly "orphans" adopted who still had living relatives in Ethiopia.

Wereldkinderen is and has always been (in our experience) very strict and thorough in their contacts with countries for Intercountry Adoption.
The Hague Convention is one of the leading (legal)background documents which is important for them in this respect.

"...Every child has the right to grow up in a loving family or family replacing situation..." (UN treaty Rights of the child)
Or as they say at Wereldkinderen :" Every child has a right to a home".

Which in a nutshell are the basic thoughts (or should be!).

As mentioned earlier, for us adopting came from a selfish wish to bring up a child and live as a family with children.

Our second adoption stems from the same desire, as I said recently to Jane:
'We have 4 chairs, it feels like there is (still) an empty space at the table, in our house and in our lives, a space for one more child.To fill it with laughter, little cries and excitement!.'

In January this year my eldest sister went as a volunteer to an orphanage in Mombasa. Me and my youngest sister visited her in February 2011.
I talked to the wonderful family who runs the Happy Rock Home and thought things over.

Ethiopia is 'closed', at least through our agency and after much thought and discussion we eventually phoned Wereldkinderen and discussed with them other possibilities like Kenya.
After phone calls and emails we had a meeting in person and decided to go for it in july this year.

So, this is where we are now!

An exiting time for us, the people at Wereldkinderen and family & friends who follow and support us.
Peter & Jane.

Feel free to comment!

Ja! stap 1 Succesvol ... Yes! step 1 Succesful ...

Hej All,

Even kort de bevestiging dat we (net voor onze vakantie) alle documenten hebben ingestuurd naar Wereldkinderen (WK) en dat alles daar OK is aangekomen.

Nu is "ons" gedeelte in NL grotendeels 'voorbij' en is het wachten op nader bericht dat WK alles naar Kenya Fed-Ex't en dat het daar ok is ontvangen...

(zie verder eerdere bericht over de procedures aldaar)

mvgroeten,
Peter & Jane

---

Hej All,

Just a short confirmation that we (just before our holiday) have sent all documents to Wereldkinderen Agency (WK) and that they received everything alright.

That means that "our" part of the work for now is mainly finished,
And we have to wait till the CWSK (Child Welfare Society of Kenya)
has received the package OK from WK.

After that the National Adoption Authority in Kenya will come with their
decision, hopefully before the end of September.

with our best regards,
Peter & Jane